Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
So I'm dropping a fat deuce at work, and the lock on the stall door slips and the door slides open, when suddenly someone comes in. Now I have two options, I can either get up quickly and try to shut the door quickly (not easy to do with one hand) or I can just sit there and play it off like it's no big deal and I always dump at work with the door open. I chose option two, and it was as awkward as it sounds.
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
Randomize