it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
Randomize
