Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
PS if you want to hear something hilarious as my little sister was showing me her engagement ring I open a Snapchat from R and it's literally a dick pic. Very different points in our life
Why do all my exes just become Tom Hanks in Castaway?
That's a fantastic question. And an odd set of criteria to meet if wanting to date you.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
So I wake up to my ex girlfriends underwear hanging from the ceiling fan and the only thing i can think of is "what time is the game"
Randomize
