she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
I feel like everyone would be happy with that as a present too. "Oh you got me pussy for Christmas?! How'd you know?!"
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
Randomize
