Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
Well douche your snatch and let's go!
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
i totally just wrapped her wedding gift in tin foil. These are the skills 2 bachelor's degrees have given me.
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
Imagine how different my life would be if I could find a man who gave me more pleasure than pizza at 2am when I'm drunk.
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
Randomize
