But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
I filled this oven with as much Pizza as I could, and I've been eating out of it for three days.
Just ate the last piece. Refilling the oven.
Okay I know I said I was going to quit drinking for a while but apparently pumpkin pie flavored vodka is a thing and I will not rest until I have some.
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
You just can't finish a sentence that starts with "I may have drunk peed in the bed" with "do you mind if I skip work and sleep here?" Anyways, yeah still drunk at work.
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize
