I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
just found out that she named her cat after me.
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
Randomize
