worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
Randomize
