So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
fries before guys. food before dudes. shakes before dates. chips before dicks. lemon bars before football stars. macaroni before screwin' tony. what i'm saying is please come to ladies' night
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
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