If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
my brother has friends over and I can hear one of them screaming from the basement "BREATHE. FILL YOUR LUNGS. LIVE YOUR LIFE." and it sounds like he's doing some motivational speaking down there but that's actually just how he encourages ppl to take bong hits
I saved a sauce packet from taco bell that said "Free me" to use in my next break up.
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
Randomize
