So drunk, too bad you don't want this
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
The low-flow toilet at my office cannot handle the intensity of this hangover.
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
Randomize
