:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
i swear every fucking time i plan a party, one of our "friends" holds their shit in all week just to punch one off into the master bathroom after i pass out. it's almost like that dump you would see in a port a potty.
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
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