Whod you bang
you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
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