is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
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