True but thats because hes a fetus.
Are you missing anything? I found a wedding ring in my bed this morning.....
If it wasnt for my iphone and loopt, I would still be wandering the streets in a drunken stooper. Thanks Steve Jobs.
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize
