i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
Randomize
