when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
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