Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
Phrase i just heard while watching the U.S. open: "Boy they have really trimmed it well, this has got to be the tightest hole in the Open."
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
I feel like delivery guys should know that when you order lunch for one and answer the door wearing sweatpants, there's no need to say "Happy Valentine's Day."
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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