soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
I think it’s appropriate to celebrate the start of mother’s day at the bar with the men that almost made me a mother
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