Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
we need to open a bar. a bar with... wait for it... A FUCKING BALL PIT.
LOL. Do you guys need a ride home?
No. we're home already. i just thought it was a brilliant fucking idea.
So I woke up this morning to find my laptop open, with a google search for "where to buy marble", and a hungover naked northern girl in my bed who told me that I claimed to be a sculptor last night and that I promised to sculpt a bust of her hands...
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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