Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
She posts like 3 statuses a day pleading for pity. Responding positively would be like giving a dog a treat for shitting on the floor.
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
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