Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
I finished my first whiskey and I'm waiting to have a second one in celebration when your pregnancy test comes back negative
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize
