I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
she peed on how many people?
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
WTF was I supposed to tell them? "hi mom and dad, this is some rando I met on the internet. please ignore the noises that will be coming from my bedroom for the next 60-90 minutes. kthxbye."
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
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