You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
I want you more than these girls want KFC
My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
Randomize