3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize