You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
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