I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
I just ate a cockroach and I want to be a fire truck.
apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
So the bitch asked me if I wanted the name brand or the generic contraceptive. Does it look like I want to be generically pregnant?
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
Randomize
