Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
NEWSFLASH - my freind is drunk and admitted that he hates having sex with dogs. should i help him or let him be??
He also left me a wonderful voice mail..... and is now asking me where the planters peanut guy is.
You should probably go find him.
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
You have no idea how awkward it is fucking someone with the same name as your dog
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
If you’re wondering why the bong is outside the garage door just know I was being environmentally efficient by not using the freezer to chill my shit
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
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