Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
Come here. I'm drunk. Family Function. Intense Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate. Bring Republicans.
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
Randomize
