I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
I don't think I'm ever gonna need a boyfriend again. I have a body pillow, a vibrator, and I'm strong enough to open my own jars.
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
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