the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
Clearly you need to take sleeping pills and put your phone in the toilet
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
Randomize
