yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
I wanted to dispute a few 411 charges on my phone bill. The service rep told me I called them four times asking for Lady Gaga's number.
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
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