as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
