You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
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