This girl is more easily done than said...
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
my roommate was being a bitch so I changed my Netflix password on her. 21st century slap in the face ladies and gentleman
I think I need to start sobriety testing my Tinder dates.
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
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