i just realized Britney Spears and I are more alike than I thought. Both of us have our parents in complete control of our lives, we both have restraining orders on previous boyfriends, and we all know both of us can put on a hell of a show
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Randomize
