What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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