yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
if happy hour never ends, you’ll never have to eat kale
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
Randomize
