Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
I just tried to unlock my house with the car remote
i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
Randomize