please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
Randomize