Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
Randomize