There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
I wish life had little blips of pornography
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
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