Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
Hey I need you to run the morning meeting, for reasons I can explain when I find out where I left my car
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
