Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
anyone who says having children is the best experience of their life obviously has never seen a vending machine carry vodka in Capri sun pouches.
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
I’m home. Please don’t call me unless you have an arterial bleed or you’re on fire. Love you 😘
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