Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
Marking my student's "don't do drugs" posters while simultaneously texting my dealer, is this what being a grown up is like?
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
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