I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
But I always wanted my obit to read "Died violently in casino orgy," not "Never woke up from rectal surgery."
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
Sorry was covered in semen when you texted me. Just walking back from the Harvard Club
All you needed to say was one of those sentences and the other would've been implied.
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Randomize
