So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
Right now I'm drinking out of a gallon water jug & eating a baconator. If you're feeling down, just remember you could be me.
We're too hungover to prance.
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
Randomize
