How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
I'm a simple man, with a social life most psychopaths would cringe at
I just realized i masturbated to the home shopping network. I either need to get a boyfriend asap, or a subscription to a porn website, or i just need to stop taking ambien
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.
Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
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