Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
Randomize
