What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
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