Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
what day is it and did you see me today?
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
I'm such a good drunk match marker. You single, you single... Drunk friend meet single boy. BOOM illegitimate baby made!
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
I'm thankful I didn't get drunk and shit my pants this year. 🦃
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
Are these your boobs on my camera?
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